Blog
“Healing is the capacity to hold pain”
~Mate
There Is No Finish Line
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. We are taught how to acquire things, not what to do when we lose them.~JamesWe live in a consumer-based culture. It seems we are always trying to acquire more...more status, more success,...
Why do we try to encourage before we comfort?
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Many times when we are grieving we may hear words of encouragement before we are offered words or gestures of comfort. We may hear things like, "You will get through this" or "Try to stay...
The Heart Makes Its Own Medicine
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Most of us ride a crisis, pulling the reins on our feelings, hoping somehow to stop them so that the pain will go away. ~Kidd We have become a grief avoidant, pain avoidant culture...
Our losses are meant to be embraced not erased
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Our losses are meant to be embraced not erased. Everything in our lives shapes us including our losses and our pain. But many of us have been taught that we need to get over our losses...
Symptoms Of Grief Are Language
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. How many nights nowhas the stream told you:"This is the way to deal with obstacles."~Pendell~ Rumi It is so difficult to go with the flow of grief especially in early grief. In the...
The Bitter Taste of Grief
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Those pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them. ~ Rumi Sometimes we don't acknowledge someone's grief because it makes us uncomfortable. Maybe we don't know what to say or we are...
Grief Has No Statute of Limitations
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Those pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them.~ Rumi In order to hear the messengers of our pain, we have to slow down and become quiet. The messengers themselves speak very...
Labyrinth of Grief
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. The pain we would much prefer to avoid can be used as a kind of battering ram for unearthing the true and the beautiful.~Matousek Grief can feel like a battering ram especially when we...
The Search For Answers
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Optimism is not required for healing.~Remen We seem to live in a culture that asks us to "always look on the bright side of life." Even in deep loss many of the messages that we get...
Grief becomes familiar (not necessarily easier).
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Healing is the capacity to hold pain.~Mate It seems we are always searching for ways to "get over" our pain. We try to numb it, deny it, avoid it. The more we try to distract ourselves...
Grief is a cocoon from which we all emerge new
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. Sorrow doesn't disappear from our life, but into our life. ~Magid It is a myth that we "get over" grief. Grief doesn't go away as it is always with us. If it disappeared it would be as...
A Grief Quarantine
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. "We are not meant to heal our way out of being human. We are meant to allow being human to heal us." ~Weist To be truly human we must allow ourselves to experience it all. All of the...
You can’t let go of what you haven’t held.
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. How does a tree block the wind?It doesn't. Instead, the tree learns to sway with the breeze as it discovers how to bend but not break. It is all of its twists and turns that give the tree its...
Shades of Darkness
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. "People spend entire lifetimes trying to avoid the things that have already happened." ~HartmannWe have already experienced a loss but many times we try to avoid the pain surrounding our...
The Wisdom of Grief
Muse: to reflect, contemplate, to meditate in silence on some subject. "Anytime you push something away it's still there."~Ram DassGrief is one of those things we want to push away. Yet she remains no matter how hard we push. And most times when we try to push...